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Change Of Plans

by Can't Swim

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1.
Everyone I ever loved I threw them into the sea When I wronged you Every song I ever sang to grant me back your heart When I wronged you A lifetime of lovers I stayed undercover, hiding myself from you Can you hear me knocking on your door? So many nights alone, left wanting more Can you see me standing in the dark? So many nights alone, left wanting more Everything I ever loved fell apart at the seams When I wronged you So can I get this demon off my back and break me free of all these memories Kinda hard to do so when it’s staring right in front me On the record covers and on all of our backdrops It’s like I’m borrowing time until my heart stops. Then would you notice me Can you hear me knocking on your door? So many nights alone, left wanting more Can you see me standing in the dark? So many nights alone, left wanting more I know it’ not my fault It’s not who I am I promise I swear it got the best of me
2.
The door closes shut. I hear a noise upstairs but I’m not sure what it was. I creep towards the stairs A faint and quiet whisper makes its way into my ears. Oh, who could it be? They beckon for an answer with a clear apology “Do you hold the key?” The ghost it sounds familiar even sounds a bit like me So young and confused a life of abuse I’m the culprit, oh I am the culprit You never believed in hope you can’t see I’m the culprit, oh I am the culprit I run up the stairs I hear the voice repeat “this is now your cross to bear” The sound travels through An image of what could have been, it looks a lot like you So young and confused a life of abuse I’m the culprit, oh I am the culprit You never believed in hope you can’t see I’m the culprit, oh I am the culprit I can’t be your spine anymore. Not enough of hours of darkness to sleep off the guilt The room was all finished and painted your name on the quilt But no one will know it’s for you No one will know it’s for you So young and confused a life of abuse You never believed in hope you can’t see
3.
Set the room ablaze You walk around With your head held high You offered out your hand Then went bye bye bye Make no mistake The past can’t be erased So now I think it’s time for me to put you in your place Won’t be ignored Can’t take it anymore You’re full of shit And I'm the one who’s calling it Smarten up and take a hint The world would be a better place with you not in it Set the room ablaze You found yourself In a tricky situation All this success every accommodation But look around Why can’t you see Every friend you ever had is now an enemy? Won’t be ignored Can’t take it anymore You’re full of shit And I'm the one who’s calling it Smarten up and take a hint The world would be a better place with you not in it This town ain’t big enough for the both of us Pack your bags Holy shit Walking round big and tall with your stupid smirk Showing off your face when you should be buried in the dirt Even hell wouldn’t take you when you’re on your knees Pack it up and leave I’m not making an apology You’re full of shit And I'm the one who’s calling it Smarten up and take a hint The world would be a better place with you not in it
4.
My ears ring and I wonder why It’s been a year since you’ve crossed my mind It’s a blur, what you did to me Was I just there to keep you company a constant reminder And I don’t why Oh, what a wicked world we live in Kiss it goodbye Concerned with the taking not the giving And I don’t why You gotta have a sick sense of humor Kiss it goodbye Who’s laughing now? Reading off predetermined lines Synchronized at the perfect time Like a page from your favorite book You set the bait and I bit the hook A constant reminder And I don’t why Oh, what a wicked world we live in Kiss it goodbye Concerned with the taking not the giving And I don’t why You gotta have a sick sense of humor Kiss it goodbye Who’s laughing now? You better fix your paranoia Kiss it goodbye You’re always so concerned if people know ya And I don’t know why I guess you got a sick sense of humor Who’s laughing now? You said you’re better off Ran my name through the dirt I guess I should’ve known that’s just how you work Your heads up in the clouds You ain’t coming down So, let me say it loud Look who’s laughing now And I don’t why Oh, what a wicked world we live in Kiss it goodbye Concerned with the taking not the giving And I don’t why You gotta have a sick sense of humor Kiss it goodbye Who’s laughing now? You better fix your paranoia Kiss it goodbye You’re always so concerned if people know ya And I don’t know why I guess you got a sick sense of humor Who’s laughing now?
5.
Think about where you were 10 years ago Nobody knew your name, no one was at your shows Looking for a purpose Never felt so nervous Didn’t work Always got caught slipping Not one outcome different Didn’t work So, don’t tell me that it never went to your head Empty rooms all the terrible things they said Think about where you were 10 years ago Now everyone can tell your cover’s blown You’ll end up all alone With no place to call your own There’s gotta be more to life than all of this I burn for better days Take a shot and find your fix Or fade into the haze There’s gotta be a better way Think about where you’ll be 10 years from now The people that you know get lowered in the ground Love becomes a burden Nothing stays for certain Go to work What’s behind the curtain? All your dreams are burning Go to work So, don’t tell me it was better when you were young The good old days sounding like you could speak in tongues Think about where you’ll be 10 years from now Now everyone can tell your cover’s blown You’ll end up all alone With no place to call your own There’s gotta be more to life than all of this I burn for better days Take a shot and find your fix Or fade into the haze There’s gotta be a better way Don’t remind me I’ve Heard it a thousand times If the good die young, I guess my time is up I’ve suffered long enough
6.
One day the world will end in fire Distorted by desire Cause everything you want doesn’t have a price Even Adam didn’t listen As he took the bite Now I gotta learn to hold it It’s gone in a moment I hated all the guilt, so I didn’t stay Now I feel him staring at my every single day Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up Usually not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of my lungs, yea Hope it helps with the damage I’ve done yea Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up It’s not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of my lungs, yea Hope it helps with the damage I’ve done yea Truth is, I knew it wasn’t for me The savior in the stories Better fold your hands and you better pray Even Peter took a chance when he didn’t stay What now? Eternity of burning? Am I so undeserving? Tried to step away and I felt the might Now I feel him staring at me every single night Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up Usually not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of my lungs, yea Hope it helps with the damage I’ve done, yea Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up It’s not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of my lungs, yea Hope it helps with the damage I’ve done, yea Though countless will perish, for eternity burned, Don’t ask me to witness Don’t seek my concern. To yield unto his Word, I cannot, you see Lest one I offend And they won't like me I guess they don’t like me Well, go save somebody else then Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up Usually not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of my lungs, yea Hope it helps with the damage I’ve done, yea Feeling it Breathing down my neck and I’m sick of it Giving up It’s not my style but I’m nearing it Sing it loud from the top of our lungs, yea Will it ever end?
7.
Digging deep to try and break the habits that I’ve made Consuming, confusing, pain doubles in weight Bruises up and down my spine with splinters in my skin You know it happens when you’re not ready for it Burn in hell, burn in hell Lingers in my head This guilt will devour us both I guess we got lost along the way Never, speak to me again It’s nothing more than just a trend I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you around No more begging you to stay All my faith has gone away I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you around Gluttony, Pride, Lust, Sloth, Envy, Greed and Wrath It brings me to my knees It made its way through me Out of step, without a breath I stumble to my feet Delaying, evading what’s in store for me Guess we got lost along the way Burn in hell, burn in hell Lingers in my head This guilt will devour us both Never, speak to me again It’s nothing more than just a trend I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you around No more begging you to stay All my faith has gone away I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you around Gluttony, Pride, Lust, Sloth, Envy, Greed and Wrath It brings me to my knees It made its way through me Like an image out of focus All the verses that I couldn’t read I was feeling down, my lowest Sadly, I was just too young to see Never, speak to me again It’s nothing more than just a trend I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you No more begging you to stay All my faith has gone away I can’t feel you, if I can’t see you around
8.
No matter the road I manage to go the wrong way Fixing to lose the game that I choose but can’t play The bigger you are the harder you fall so they say Well, I fell fucking hard enough for way fucking longer enough, mate Thought I had it right, but it got lost along the way Thought they had it wrong, guess I am everything they say Tried to keep it up but now I’m down to my last nerve I had to ask myself, is bad luck all that I deserve “an ungrateful son of a bitch who couldn’t take the heat” No matter the case, I finish the race in last place Betting to lose, whatever I choose, a slap in the face The bigger you are the harder you fall so they say Well, I fell fucking hard enough for way fucking longer enough, mate Thought I had it right, but it got lost along the way Thought they had it wrong, guess I am everything they say Tried to keep it up but now I’m down to my last nerve I had to ask myself, is bad luck all that I deserve So, raise your glass to a second chance Better luck next time
9.
How does it feel when you finally know? Rewrote the history, made it up as we go Shot and missed who was I fooling Read the list who was I choosing Don’t contemplate before you medicate You’ll feel whole again one day Reminisce, no hesitating Total bliss, intoxicating I always knew that I would lose you Thinking about you when You’re thinking about me and Thinking about you and Thinking about leaving I’m sick of every single night Wondering if what I said was right Thinking about you and Thinking about leaving How does it feel when you first wake up? The bond we had I guess was not enough Just erase another lover Filled the space now with another I always knew that I would lose you Thinking about you when You’re thinking about me and Thinking about you and Thinking about leaving I’m sick of every single night Wondering if what I said was right Thinking about you and Thinking about leaving And it is both a blessing and a curse Feel it all at once then back in reverse I didn’t know, I wasn’t ready Felt the love fall around us like confetti You took a shot, a warning sign Told me everything I knew would fall apart in time If it gets too heavy, don’t let it in Just end the story and start again I always knew that I would lose you I never thought that I would choose to
10.
The dressers and counters we fucked on for hours You held me so close I felt high Shaken and fearful A match, with no equal I hate to admit you were right The medicine wore off And then I just explode (got it running all through my veins) And I just want to know (can I burn it all up in flames?) Got me seeing red I explode (got it running all through my veins) And I just want to know (can I burn it all up in flames?) Got me seeing red I don’t need it And I don’t want nothing to do with you anymore The lying and cheating that felt so relieving The things that we do to stay numb The meaningless sex Try and cover your steps up The things that we do when we’re young The medicine wore off And then I just explode (got it running all through my veins) And I just want to know (can I burn it all up in flames?) Got me seeing red I explode (got it running all through my veins) And I just want to know (can I burn it all up in flames?) Got me seeing red I don’t need it And I don’t want nothing to do with you anymore Torn and tattered, left me in such a mess Felt so blinded by the lies that you weave I find it hard to believe your intentions were true When it’s so obvious that you wanted to Hurt me And I don’t want nothing to do with you anymore This is hopeless
11.
Where the fuck did we go wrong? Choked by the tragedy Forget what you did to me I tried but I can’t relate Let’s start over How did we end this way? Still running in circles Got to the final scene Saw the end I can't bear to see Everyone that I know, I hate Surrounded by evil Surrounded by fakes Strike us all down bring on the plague Light us on fire to brighten my day Self-destruct again Think of the time we spent I ask myself where it went Before we drift away Let’s start over How do I leave this place? Kicking and screaming The ending; a mystery Closed my eyes I can't bear to see Your face again Everyone that I know, I hate Surrounded by evil Surrounded by fakes Strike us all down bring on the plague Light us on fire to brighten my day On the whitest cliffs I’ve ever seen I yelled your name The miles that I ran until I saw your face Sat on top a bench beneath a tree, I held your hand A different time, a different place, I tried to understand I tried But you threw it all away

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released October 22, 2021

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